Guilt

Im home. After a few days of forcing myself to surrender I kindly reminded myself… It’s okay to slow down in a way that feels right for me.

Last week was crazy, moving up our lives, lots of walking ( Covid friendly goodbyes) driving home, no sleep, lots of emotions. I knew once we got home I would need to slow down and rest. But immediately guilt began to creep in.
Why do we feel so guilty for not “doing” when “being” is more important?

There are times where I push myself faster than the pace of my being.
I did things because I thought I “should” do them and not because I intuitively wanted to.

A lot of my friends who teach yoga were posting new offerings and it felt like spring was a good time to plant seeds or encourage new growth but I just felt dormant. Like I didn’t have a huge amount to offer quite yet, even though I had a mountain of time on my hands. Is it okay for me to stay beneath the soil a little longer. Until I’m ready?

I should post on social media when I feel inspired, not because I think I “should.”

It feels liberating to put up boundaries, to say no. With each little rebellion, I’m shifting the old patterns. There’s a growing distance between my thoughts and reactions, which I don’t think was there before.

I choose to be gentle with myself. I just needed to slow down in a different way. It’s actually not that hard to do less. The hard part slowing down and enjoying it, despite the overactive mind.

These last couple of days have felt like a form of surrender.
Im attending classes and stepping into the role of a student again. ( Even though these ‘slowing down’ practices where rocket and strong vinyasa classes, it felt like slowing down for me) Im practicing self care and having mindful moments with food. Im finding freedom in both body and mind.

I feeling called to move at a pace of my being, rather than my thoughts. All it took was for me to listen to my body and heart first, before the mind.

Let go of the expectation, let go of the fight, and allow the flow to carry you exactly where you need to be!